My grandparents and one out of my fathers three brothers with his wife and son and daughter moved to Florida when I was very young. We only went up to visit them twice before I was even 12 years old, and they have all come to see us maybe three or four times. My Uncle Mike was always well kept.He dyed his hair, got manicures(without color) and all my family has always busted his balls. Last Christmas my Uncle Mike called my other two uncles (not my father) to tell them that they were going to come up for Christmas and to be prepared because at home he dressed as a woman and he wanted to come up as herself.
He never called my dad.
My father and my Uncle Mike NEVER agree on anything. Expecially politics. I think my Uncle was most scared of his opinion because he was always very close minded towards him and it was his way or no way.
My dad was mad when he found out and my uncle didnt tell him and also shocked because how does this happen to an "italian man" with a wife and kids.
My Aunt Mia chickened out of coming to visit.
She has been more and more open to who she is lately, even making a facebook of her new self and adding old friends from high school and Rhode Island.
My father got so many questions about her from his friends and people he sees everyday. Working in the community they grew up in, I even got questions about it. My dad always turned it into a joke though. My dad even got a birthday card from his sister and got very angry about it, thinking that my aunt was just busting his balls.
I didn't think it was funny, but at first I was pretty mad that she did that to her family. My cousin Zack got into fights at school over it, and what must her wife think about it?
Then they all came to visit over the summer. They broke the news that they were looking for a house back in Rhode Island. My Aunt Mitzy kept telling us how "her and I think its best if" and "She wants this, " and I remember thinking why does my cousin Ashley have so much say in this? and it took me fifteen minutes of conversation to realize she meant my new Aunt.
We went out in public with them and my dad was very uncomfortable, both of my Uncles were away in Kawait so they didn't see them but I know one of my Uncles refuses to talk about it with his wife and two young daughters.
I decided to write about this because last night I received a text from my father saying that "Uncle Mike sold his house in Florida" ......which means she is moving here. The second text was "You ladies can all get together and do your nails."
Its hard to tell my father that he is being close minded when he grew up with all brothers and knew one thing his whole life. I know that this whole situation just makes him uncomfortable and making jokes is his way of handling it, but I also now know that it is wrong.
I think being in class we learn the what is right and wrong about dealing with gender issues and such but applying it to your own life and family is harder then a person you did not know prior.
I am accepting it, but I know my father still hasn't. I still struggle with if i am going to correct him or tell him he is being innapropriate. I want to let him deal with it in his own way because I know when they move here he will come around, but at the same time I feel like it is my responsibility to correct him.